Why do I even wait for you…

Why do I even bother to expect a call from you, expect a message from you, expect anything from you. Even when I know in the back of my mind that you aren’t, I still constantly check my phone for your calls and text, and I even check my tumblr and look at the messages to see if maybe just maybe you thought about leaving me something there. All I do is disappoint myself, sometimes I walk away from my phone leaving it for an hour or two feeling big and bad like a boss not giving two fucks but then after all that I run to my phone with a smile on my face with that deceiving feeling of knowing that you either called or texted, only just to find myself with a frown and a reason to keep my head down. It’s almost like I have my back turned walking the opposite direction from you, but my little big heart pulls my shirt trying to stop me and tell me that I’m not doing the right thing. I don’t really know what I’m doing from this point on, I’m kind of incomplete without you.

I miss you, please tell me if you do too…